— 06/10/2024
So apart from messing with the site layout + trying to make sure it looks decently okay on desktop sites, despite my website still breaking for certain elements (looking at you, stat counter...), I'm? quite plesantly surprised with how this is coming along. I remember when I first started on this site, it looked. So painfully basic. And I guess in a weird way, it still is in its current state but it certaintly does look WAY better than how it looked before; it's a lot cleaner than it used to be and things just feel more... right, if that's the word. On top of that, my site just feels like a breath of fresh air in an open acre of meadows. I can actually feel myself being here and I don't have to deal with suffocating layouts.
I'm still trying to figure out what to do with the journal half... Maybe I can make it its own thing and dedicate the homepage to site updates, links to my webrings that I am part of, things like that. I would have to think on it a little more but so far those are the rough ideas that are marinating in my brain right about now.
In other news, I have been struggling with mental health expenses alongside trying to get things settled with finance and education. So, if in the near future I am not as active or updating the site as much as I would like to, that would mean that I am a very busy work horse trying to get my degree and get a (possible) income.
I think this is where I should sign off for now; it's getting very late where I am (it's 10:05pm) and I want to try and rest up before I start working on the site again. I've a lot a things to work on pertaining to the shrines and the rest of the pages! C'ya!!
— 06/10/2024
So, you may have noticed that the homepage looks a bit different than usual! That's because, while I did loved how it looked initially, I thought I could do better in terms of web design and layout.
Thus, I began working from the ground up and remade the homepage site to look not as chunky and cluttered as before! Something about this kind of layout feels much, much cleaner and a lot more... fresher, I should say. Maybe for this journal, I might make a seperate page just to write down my days and moods like this? Though, I fear some would be far too personal for a site like this （；´д｀）ゞ
But either way, I got the site layout for my homepage down and I am much happier with how this looks ^^ Maybe one day, I'll work on the other sites so it doesn't look as... mish-mashed when you click from one page to the other. I just gotta figure out how is all...
This is my journal for tonight! I'll be sure to update the site news thingie and I shall be on with my day (coding more website stuff, of course @_@)
— 06/05/2024
I like to go on a record to say this: I, have never once, felt this in love with going on a date with a significant other... but this date with Mecha send me head over hooves for her! Like, honestly, I don't think I felt myself get this flustered with a partner before I began dating Mecha yet everything that she did, everything that xe said still leaves me thinking so much in such a small amount of time.
I think the one part that stuck out to me so vividly and so clearly was that, when I confided to Mecha that I like to use masculine terms since it ties in with my butch lesbian and transmasculine identity (case in point: I like to refer to myself as a boyfriend/husband in a lesbian way, etc. etc.). And Mecha, being the biggest sweetheart that she is, called me a word I will never ever leave out of my head.
They call me their hubby...
I swear at that moment, I felt my skin become into flames and my heart/head began to spin, and... Oh, I could go on forever. That small gesture just made me fall madly in love with xyr all over again and it's been making me so giddy everytime I thought about it again.
I actually forgot to mention it but this is actually my first ever date with Mecha. It was a VRChat date in a world that Mecha specifcally made for themself based off of one of their characters. It had such a pretty nighttime view and everything, fitted with a lot of old and retro computer equipment that made everything feel so comfy and cozy. Maybe if we go on a date again, I could probably invite her to show me other worlds that she finds... If she's okay with it, of course!
I should end the journal here since it's about to turn into the next thing but one last thing before I go: After the date, Mecha and I were being gay in eachother's DMs (as per usual LOL) and she also called me another sweet pet name: she called me her Tex ❤.
Now, for those of you that don't know, Tex is the name of a G1 My Little Pony from the Big Brother Ponies timeline that introduced stallions and colts to the My Little Pony universe. And xe called me xyr Tex since I was wearing an avatar of that very same MLP character. Needless to say, that made my heart so warm, fuzzy, and giddy that I exploded into fireworks. Also in turn, I called Mecha my Star Catcher after the G3 My Little Pony character of the same name.
Can you tell that the two of us really enjoy My Little Pony?
— 06/01/2024
How funny to start this gay ass journal log at the beginning of pride month, too..!
To start off, I never thought I would be as happy as I am when I got together with Mecha but here we are... Literally, every waking moment, I immediately check my messages to see if my girlfriend sent me a good morning message or even just a simple kiss and a hug through online chat means. She even gets to message me on my own website via my chatbox! Literally, what more could I ask for with a partner like Mecha ❤ ?
On top of that, they're also super considerate and listening, too! And xey always so romantic with xeir petnames, calling me a doll, love, and hopefully even more that xey can think of.
It just makes me think a lot, y'know? When I was with my ex-boyfriend (don't blame me, it was comp-het), I was destined to think that my ex's reactivity and toxic/uncomfortable behavior was out of love, that I had to deal with all the little uncomfortable moments of boundaries being trespassed or trying to cross over eggshells just to even get an inch of love that we had back before (and that's not even including the racist moments that came from him at some points...)
But with Mecha, I can tell this one will be different. Sure, we've only started dating just about a week ago and my brain is still very nervous about being in a relationship again after so long but... Seeing just how much Mecha cares about me and how much they want to help me get better as well as learning alongside me since it's also been long since they've gotten into a relationship makes me feel so... whole inside? Not used up? Not left behind? I'm not sure but I think it makes me tear up a little that I came from two relationships that only saw me superficially while also spouting uncomfortable nonsense to one where it's just the both of us are inexperienced and still taking it easy, yet we are both just so ... passionate and caring about each other that it makes me tear up a little.
Okay, well. My heart is tearing up a lot but my eyes can only tear up a bit.
Just.. Have I been starved of genuine love and interest for that long? Am I really deserving of this kind of love? ... I probably should put these certain types of relationship talk things in their own little diary because oh my I tend to get... a bit heartfelt and touchy with some of these things. Well, as they say: It's better to get it out than to bottle it in.
I think this might be the time where I can sign off for this journal log. I got some emotions out and maybe tomorrow, I'll ramble about whatever is on my mind at the moment! See you when I see you guys!
— 05/31/2024
Since I last worked on this site, I keep thinking back to myself at just how far I've come! I went from growing more miserable by the minute from just even looking at the code to whipping up pages and styling them like their brand new ponies straight out the box! I think that's loads impressive to me!
Aside from that, I talked with my therapist about this site as well as having a girlfriend (like I stated before, you guys are gonna be hearing about her a lot). She also agreed that yeah, my ex was a huge piece of shit and that I shouldn't have to worry about him when I am dating my girlfriend. And you know what? She's right on that regard.
I mean, why should I have to think about my shitty ex who would always put me down or ask so, so much for me while also disregarding my feelings when I can spend the result of my days just thinking about my beautiful girlfriend whom I love and adore. I think the answer speaks for itself here...
I would try and write more here in this log but my brain is... very tired (；′⌒`) I think I need to take a nap or even a snooze. Catch you guys later when I write in here again!
— 06/1/2024, 12:18am
YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHO FIGURED OUT HOW TO DO FONTS NOW...
*ahem* Apologies for that giant wall of text but, finally, after SO long, I am finally able to use custom fonts on this website! So no more default fonts anymore! Yippee!!
I'm also coding this site to make it look niceys while also hanging with my friends (HI, GRIMM and TAYLOR!) so I think all is right in the world!
Also, I know I should've started another log for this part but shh...
— 05/30/2024
So, ... it turns out I kinda forgot to finish that last journal log before I even published it to this website. That was a fluke on my behalf! Usually I try and keep up with journaling on this site as much as possible but wow I must've been so stressed from those fonts that I completely forgot to work on the journal log itself! Ah well. At least now I can catch up with what I left off.
Now, let's see here, where did I leave off..? Oh yeah! I got to change the fonts on this site to very (and I mean very basic) fonts that are already stored on this computer. So, that's a start at least! I will have to troubleshoot how to mess with the fonts on another day but for now, I think this is a pretty cute look!
As for the best friends page, ... I'm still working on getting it so the images aren't so squished together when I add more imageboxes (damn you flexboxes!!) and also, I want to add in cool custom icons for my friends when I can. Just to add in a spice of personalization, you feel?
— 11:56 pm
I've worked a lot on this site for the past few minutes (hours?) and currently I am parallel playing with another one of my friends on call (Hi, Grimm!) so I guess I can talk about how my day was all day I think.
I talked with my girlfriend!! We actually began talking a lot actually - way more than how we used to when we were just friends - which.. makes me happy! I love having a partner that I can just talk about my days and worries to as well as just to have fun and play around whenever. It feels so sweet, so warm, ... I may or may not be thinking about xem as I write this (^///^)
Also, wifey, if you are reading this ... Haii ヾ(≧▽≦*)o ❤ I hope you know I love you so so much!
Okay doke, I'm gonna go save this page for now since I have a lot to work on tomorrow. And I still need to write that about the webmaster page, good lord.
— 05/29/2024
Let it be known: I detest trying to put custom fonts on websites.
Like don't get me wrong, I love me some good custom fonts that make this site look so personalized and pretty but ... Goodness, is it frustrating.
— 05/27/2024, 3:01 pm
Wow... What progress this site is getting, huh!
I'm very surprised that I'm actually coding this far that it starts to look like an offical site back from the old world wide web in 1990-1999... I think it was that long ago?
In terms of current events and news stuff, ... I got to talk with my girlfriend! You guys are gonna be hearing a lot about her and no, I am not apologizing in the slightest. I'm also parallel playing with my friend as we speak (hi Taylor!) and honestly? I should mess around with the idea of parallel playing a lot more, I don't often really know what to say and when I do want to talk about things I tend to get scared of being too annoying, yknow? So, safe to say, I really like the idea of parallel playing; I can work on cool site stuff AND hang out with my friends while they do other things as well! It's like a win-win!
Now for the website stuff, I've been messing around with a lot of coding and HTML work on this site and I am seriously proud with how it's turning out! Like, wow, I was able to put together a really decent site with columns, links and everything... Now, I have to work on the other pages for this site also @_@ I am not ready.
BUT! Never say never, as they say, and I'm gonna keep working on these sites more as I learn more of this webmastery stuff. Maybe I'll make an about page pretty soon!
— 05/26/2024, 2:10 pm
So, I come with important news! Well, actually TWO important news things!
One of them being this: I finally got that USB to Wi-Fi router thing to work on my girl and, with a few things to tweak here and there, I was able to get her up and running! No more will I have to suffer low computer storage OR messy laptop layouts!
And the second sort of news being ... quite the personal yet dearest one: I now have a girlfriend ❤ !!
Me and her are taking it steady (I think for now) but my heart is slowly accepting the fact that yes, I will find romantic love even if it's scary and yes, me and them ARE made for one another. Xey even mentioned about me and xem being a unicorn and dragon couple and it's driving me so crazy in the most romantic way possible. I wish I had the words to truly tell them how I feel because she makes my heart melt everytime I see her..
Okay, those should be the last things I will update on this blogging block for nowsies. If anything more happens, I will (hopefully) try and update this site accordingly. For now, I am going to mess around with the other sites to see what I can do from here. Cheers!
I got a new computer! And by that I mean, I finally got the monitor for my new PC, which I got a long while before I made this site and I got my keyboard even before I got my PC!
So needless to say, it took a bit of time and some (by some I mean a lot) of money.
Even still, I'm actually excited to start actually doing things on my other, brand new computer! Don't get me wrong, I love coding and playing and all that jazz on this laptop I call my friend (his name is ... undecided but I love him still) but he has been very slow and laggy + not to mention, he has been running very, very low on space. So, needless to say, I think it's time for this old man to go get some rest... at least until I go to trips or I just don't feel like booting my big new girl up.
Speaking of which, I should probably talk about her! She's a pre-built gaming PC that I bought off of Mecari and she runs on Windows 10! What luck! Usually with computers nowadays, they come pre-built with all sorts of gnarly knick-knacks that you don't really want on your PC such as bloatware, adware, spyware, or even ...*gulp* AI that scrapes off of other people's hard work. So, thank god for Windows 10 ... even if it's a bit outdated.
Once small catch about my new girl, though? ... She has no Wi-Fi card built into her, much to my mother's disappointment.
Honestly, though? I'm not too mad! I don't mind having an new girl who is old-fashioned in her ways and either way, we'll be getting a USB for her that'll help her connect to the internet so she won't be so isolated from the cyberspace. That and I think she sort of needs it if I want to try coding and playing games with her.
For now, this is where I'll sign off. I'll be waiting for that USB Wi-Fi thingie that'll help her connect to our internet and I will (hopefully and finally) put this old boy to rest. He did so well these past 4 years and has seen me in my absolute worst. I'm proud of you, little old man!
This site is still a work in progress but it's nice to see anyone who came and visited the site! To those who are curious passerby, welcome!
As of right now, I ... am still trying to learn HTML and CSS and all that gobble-de-gook but so far I am impressed with how this site is becoming so far. It has taken me a lot of references for myself AND from others to try and navigate coding since I haven't learned it all that much since 12th grade (as far as I'm aware, anyways.)
As you navigate throughout this site, do be warned that it is still a work in progress and there are many more things to be worked on and polished. Think of this site as maybe ... in its pre-alpha build? IDK.
Regardless, I hope you all have fun looking through this site as it gets worked on! I am getting a headache myself so I think this is where I should close off this blogging journal. Maybe I'll add more personal stuff later on!
This page is protected by an
A group of owls is called a parliament.
Want your own? Visit hekate.neocities.org!
This site says NO to AI!
I am 
